The Other Side of the Fence

The poet Robert Frost writes, “Good fences make good neighbors.” He is pointing out the need for some level of privacy in all of our relationships; that things work out better when we keep a healthy distance from our neighbors. Unfortunately, many of us take this axiom to an extreme and struggle with putting up walls in our lives. In keeping our distance we often fail to see those God is calling us to love.

The theologian William Barclay writes about a group of soldiers during World War II who had lost a friend in battle and wanted to give their fallen comrade a decent burial. So they found a church with a graveyard behind it, surrounded by a white fence. They found the parish priest and asked if their friend could be buried there in the church graveyard.

“Was he Catholic?” the priest inquired.

“No he was not,” answered the soldiers.

“I’m sorry, then,” said the priest. “Our graveyard is reserved for members of the holy church. But you can bury your friend outside the fence. I will see that the gravesite is cared for.”

“Thank you Father,” said the soldiers, and they proceeded to bury their friend just outside the graveyard on the other side of the fence.

When the war had finally ended, before the soldiers returned home, they decided to visit the gravesite of their friend. They remembered the location of the church – and the grave, just outside the fence. They searched for it, but couldn’t find it. Finally, they went to the priest to inquire as to its location.

“Sir, we cannot find our friend’s grave,” said the soldiers to the priest.

“Well,” answered the priest. “After you buried your fallen friend, it just didn’t seem right to me that he should be buried there, outside the fence.”

“So you moved his grave?” asked the soldiers.

“No,” said the priest. “I moved the fence.”

I wonder how many times in life I look at people around me as “outside the fence.” They may look different, dress different or live in a different neighborhood. They may worship at another church or not go to church all together. They may support a different presidential candidate or work for a different cause. It is very easy to label others and thus keep our distance. When our ideas or assumptions are challenged, we build up our fence all the higher and make sure we surround ourselves with people who see the world the exact same way.

I believe many of us live in gated communities of faith. We gather all the like-minded people on one side and leave the “other folks” on the outside. We wonder why the church is not growing, while all the while we are pushing people away. The Bible is filled with many stories of religious types trying to get Jesus to condemn someone on the outside. This includes drunks, tax collectors and a woman who had committed adultery. Every time the proper church going folk called on Jesus to condemn these people outside the fence, Jesus welcomed them in. Jesus moved the fence so that God’s love would include them. God moved the fence so that we could be written into the divine plan of salvation.

As we celebrate Valentine’s Day and remember those we love with cards, candy and flowers, let’s not forget about those on the other side of the fence. God calls all of us to mirror the unconditional love of Jesus Christ. Good fences may make good neighbors, but they make lousy Christians. Take down your walls and make it a point to reach out to others. Make it a point to move your fence and love your neighbors.

In Hope and Confidence,

Pastor Dave